Deterrent - One Choice Will Fix You
by Furtive
Summary: "Then what the hell am I, Matthew?" I say angrily. "You're Deterrent, he says..."And they're coming you." Tobias' story still continues in this fan-made sequel to Allegiant. If Tobias isn't Divergent than what is he? Clearly he isn't Amity, or Candor, or Erudite. He might not even be Dauntless or Abnegation. Why does it matter? Why is he in danger? How did he become, deterrent?
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer: I do not own any of characters or plot lines from the Divergent Trilogy. They all belong to the fantastic writer, Veronica Roth. **_

_**Authors Note: I've been wanting to try and write something for a while now. This is going to be a sequel to Allegiant. The story begins about one year after the ending. Please leave a review to tell me what you think! I really want to work on my writing, so any constructive criticism is welcome. I'll try to post as frequently as possible. I'm a very slow writer so please give me time. :)**_

_**P.S. I'm not from the U.S. and so I'm sorry if the spelling of some words are different. (Like colour instead of color) It's just that I've been taught to spell it that way my entire life so I'm very sorry if it bothers you. And also, I've been using the Internet to learn about Chicago and everything and we all know how reliable the Internet is. If I got anything incorrect please tell me! Thank you!**_

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><p><em><strong><span>Chapter 1<span>**_

I SIT IN the front row next to Evelyn with my heart pounding against my chest. The room we are in brings me an aching nostalgic feeling in the pit of my stomach.

Johanna is on stage sitting next to the other five representatives. Standing at the podium is Erin Webb, the history expert from the fringe. Being the storyteller that he is, he made sure to squeeze in a short lecture on history in his speech by explaining why he prefers to call Chicago, "the fourth city." It's a lecture I've heard way too many times due to the fact the he happens to be my neighbour. However, on an occasion like this, I take in every single word he says, reminiscing about what my life had been like.

I watch him as he runs a hand through his short grey beard. His belly protrudes over his belt considerably, but with his short stature and his blithesome attitude, it actually suits him quite well.

He speaks his words slowly and smoothly, with a moderately high voice, which carries itself throughout the Hub.

"Although the fourth city has faced its darker moments, today we celebrate change. Today, we have all gathered inside this great building, not as single persons. No. Today, we stand together as one. Nothing is separating us. Not violence. Not factions. Not genetics. We are all equal."

The crowd begins to cheer and applaud.

Three years ago, I would have thought that living life without factions would have been difficult. Impossible. But life without factions allowed me to feel something that I never knew I would ever get to truly experience. Freedom.

"Today, we move on from the violence that we endured. Today, not only do we take a step forward for the fourth city - we take one step forward for the United States of America," His face is then filled with a big smile.

"Before I announce the winner of this election, I am pleased to announce that our representatives of Chicago have been invited to meet with the Government in Washington. There they will discuss rebuilding the country into the glorious nation it once was."

The crowd cheers even louder - maybe even louder than the dauntless all those years ago. Even I am filled with delight. We have been negotiating with the government for quite some time by communicating with them through the computers at the Bureau.

After Chicago opened up for everyone, many people began embracing the idea of equality and demanded that the government started to embrace it as well. After all of the violence we've been through, Chicago pledged to negotiate peacefully while those in the fringe started to become enraged and ready to start another war. I knew it was only a matter of time before they finally agreed to what we had to say.

"And now, without any further ado, the new President of Chicago is -" Erin opens up a small envelope and slowly slips out a small piece of paper.

"Johanna Reyes." Erin says with a great big smile.

The other representatives smile and shake hands with Johanna, despite not being elected, and Johanna walks up to the podium and begins her acceptance speech.

I sit back into my seat in an attempt to feel more comfortable for the remainder of the event. But no matter how I sit, the pounding in my heart is too hard to ignore.

It pounds because of tomorrow

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><p>A banquet is held after the election to celebrate. Not just for Johanna's victory, but also to celebrate the fact that the representatives have been invited to speak with the government. In fact, they leave tonight and have all packed their bags. Zeke and Amar are packed for the trip as well. They're needed to drive, but are also going as a precaution - to protect the representatives in case anything goes wrong. It still isn't flowers and sunshine outside of Chicago.<p>

A lot of people are here. Each table I look at is full of people. Some tables have almost ten to eleven people seated at once.

A few tables away, I can see Evelyn talking to Hana. They smile and laugh which makes my mouth twitch upward slightly. I'm glad Evelyn has a friend.

At the very front of the room sit our representatives. At the far end of the table sits Johanna. To her right sits John Bore and Diana Lee and to her left is Carter Fallon and Grant Clarke.

I sit at a table with Zeke, Shauna, Cara, Christina, Caleb, George, and Amar. All of my friends who had helped me this past year are here - except Matthew, who couldn't come tonight because he said he had work. Probably finishing up on his memory experiment.

I decide to tune back into their small debate.

"Well, historically speaking, when our ancestors elected someone to be the leader of Chicago, they would call them the mayor! Not the president! Chicago is a city, not a country," Caleb rambles.

"He's right." Cara says.

I've been able to slowly begin talking to Caleb again. It occurred to me that Tris would want me to be kind to the only person left in her family. A similar thought must have come to Caleb as well, since we both have been trying to make conversation with each other recently.

"Oh stop it. President sounds cooler. Who cares anyway? I mean, weren't our ancestors also the people who called their big, fancy government headquarters, 'the White House,'" Zeke remarks humourously.

"I'm with Ezekiel," Amar says, patting Zeke on the back. Zeke gives an exaggerated wide grin.

"I believe back then it was actually a house for the President," Caleb argues.

"Come on Caleb, you have to admit that name sounds stupid. They even named a city Washington."

"Our ancestors were the one who named this city too! And came up with the word, 'president' in the first place!"

Zeke gives Caleb a glare. He can't come up with anything to say back. He has been defeated.

"Oh come on Zeke. Don't glare at him like that. Be a good sport," I say chuckling.

"You're still right you know. President still sounds a lot cooler," Shauna say, patting him on the back.

George nods his head. "I second that."

"All in favour of president over mayor, raise your hand," Christina says.

Everyone except Caleb and Cara have their hands raised and Zeke jumps up from his seat and yells to celebrate his victory. Everyone in the banquet becomes startled and a moment of awkward silence breaks over the room.

We all begin to laugh hysterically.

I still remember what Christina said that day. Right now, this is an example of one of the _moments that don't suck_. Recently, I have been noticing a lot more moments like this. That's the trick after all.

It is these moments that almost make the weight in my chest go away. Almost.

I see Johanna coming towards me with a big smile and excuse myself.

"Congratulations." I shake hands with her.

Being her assistant, I've had to shake hands with a lot of people and so I'm no longer uncomfortable with it.

"Thank you Tobias." She smiles. "I was just talking with the representatives and we all agree that you've been doing a great job." She pauses and takes a deep breath. "We want to invite you to come with us to Washington."

At first I'm stunned. And for a second, I even consider going. _Me_. They want _me_ to go with them. But although it's tempting, I know that I just can't. If it just wasn't today, maybe I would say yes.

"It's an honour, Johanna, to be invited to come, but I-" I begin to slightly shake my head.

She begins to nod.

"You don't need to explain Tobias. I understand." She smiles with sympathy.

"Thank-you, Johanna. For everything."

"No need to thank me. I had a feeling you wouldn't want to come because of the timing. But, you know, while I'm gone, I'll need someone I can trust to run the city for me. You up for the job?"

Excitement and disbelief races through me.

"Really?"

"Of course, Tobias." She smiles. "So you better not mess up," she jokes.

I laugh and thank her again and I turn away to go back to our seats.

"Oh and one more thing," she says.

I turn back around.

"She would be very proud of you, Tobias." And she turns around and goes back to her seat.

I know what Johanna meant when she said that. I know that her words were genuine and kind. But I can't stop myself from feeling the slight strain on my heart when I heard it.

Most days aren't like today. Most days are actually normal, since it_ has_ been three, almost four years. But there's just something about hearing that comment that hits me right where I felt vulnerable.

_It's because of tomorrow_. I can't go with them, because tomorrow will be exactly one year from the day Tris' ashes were scattered. I have to be there tomorrow. I have to be there to give her flowers.

I sit back down in my seat.

We all chat and goof around for the next few hours. Eventually, the night draws to an end, and the representatives get ready to leave for Washington. It will be about a twelve hour drive.

Zeke gives everyone a hug, and Shauna a big kiss. Amar isn't as big of a fan of public affection, so he gives George a hug and waves to everyone else.

I look over to the representatives and see John place a gentle kiss on his daughter's head. Diana does the same with her three boys. They surround and trap her inside a big hug. I see Carter kissing his wife, Sophia. Her stomach has grown into the size of a watermelon due to her pregnancy. Grant hugs his brother and I see Johanna waving goodbye towards me and Evelyn and we both return the gesture.

Evelyn and Johanna have become very good friends over the past year. I never expected it to happen, but I'm glad it did. They've become best friends, and that friendship slowly made Evelyn back into the woman I used to know when I was a child in abnegation. Back into the woman I call mom.

Everyone finally gets in the car and the engine turns on. We all cheer as loud as we could until it disappeared in the distance.

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><p>When I finally get to the door of my apartment, my watch says it's 1:33AM. Erin and I exchange our farewells, since we live right beside each other, and I unlock the door.<p>

My apartment has acquired a bit more furniture. I've added a few more chairs, a coffee table, a rug, etc. Just yesterday, I got myself a new couch since the old one was getting a bit worn down and some of the cushions began to tear. It still looks a bit empty, but I like it this way. The blue sculpture Evelyn gave me sits on my bedside table.

When my body hits the bed I doze off immediately.

It felt like barely a minute later that I hear someone knocking on my door.

I groan as I get up to see who it is.

Halfway to the door, they knock again.

"I'm coming," I call out.

When I finally swing the door open, I see Matthew.

He immediately pushes me inside and shuts the door. He's breathing hard, as if he'd been running.

Before I can even say anything, he begins.

"They're coming for you," he says as he tries to catch his breath. "I remember now."

I look at him with concern.

"Are you alright Matthew? You're not making any sense."

"Just listen to me." he says through heavy breaths. "You're in danger."

He takes a moment to collect himself.

Quite frankly, I'm more concerned about him than me at the moment. There is definitely something terribly wrong. He hands shake slightly and he looks exhausted. I offer him a glass of water but he just continues.

"A few years ago, when I looked at your genetics, I told you that you weren't Divergent. That you were a GD."

My heart begins to race. I know that whatever he has to say, is not going to be good.

"Well, as it turns out, you aren't a GD."

I run my hands down my face and let out a deep sigh. Did he really wake me up in the middle of the night, just to tell me that it turns out I'm Divergent?

"So does that mean I'm a GP? Look, if you messed up back then, I forgive you. None of the matters anymore anyway. It's late, you look tired, so just go home and -"

"No." He stares at me. "You aren't a GP... But you are also _not_ a GD."

"You aren't making any sense."

"Just let me explain!" he shouts. He's being hysterical. The more I look at him, it's as if he hasn't slept for days. He has dark bags under his red, straining eyes.

"Think about it Tobias. It makes sense. You aren't Divergent. But there is no way you are Amity. Or Candor. Or Erudite. _Or_ Dauntless._ Or_ Abnegation. You are none of them. You don't fit in anywhere."

I'm starting to lose my patience.

"Then what the hell am I, Matthew?" I say angrily.

"You're Deterrent," he says, so quietly I almost didn't hear him. He looks around the room as if checking to see if we're being watched.

"And they are coming for you."


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or plot lines from the Divergent Trilogy. They all belong to the fantastic writer, Veronica Roth :)**_

_**Author's Note: Hello! I am so sorry this took so long. I've had so much homework and I procrastinated so much. I was intending for this chapter to be longer and to reveal a bit more but it's been two weeks and I felt like I needed to post something. I swear that next Sunday, the next chapter will be ready and it will be much more longer :) Hope you like it and please leave a review to motivate me to not procrastinate!**_

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><p><strong><span>Chapter 2<span>**

MY MIND IS buzzing and my heart is racing.

"Who?" I say harshly. "Who's coming for me?"

He looks at me with his frantic eyes, slightly shaking his head.

"I don't know, Tobias - but they are." he says. "This is what I found on my desk an hour ago."

He hands me a thick file. On closer observation I see that my name has been printed on the top in bold. Once I've opened it up, the first thing I see is a form.

It has all of my information. Where I lived, the date I was born, the names of my parents - everything was there. Under the section "Category," the word Deterrent has been written in a scribbled manner. I almost couldn't make out the r's in the word because it was so sloppily hand written, it shot straight upwards in a "v" shape.

When I turn the sheet over, my heart stops.

I see a bundle of photos with a thin elastic band holding it together. I place the file onto the kitchen counter and look through them quickly.

They are all photos of me. In one photo, I see myself at my choosing ceremony, standing in front of the bowls. In another, I see Evelyn, young and fair, holding a baby wrapped in a blue blanket.

What makes my heart jump is a picture of me helping Tris out of the net when she first came to dauntless, and another, standing together at the Bureau, holding each other's gaze for the last time.

The memory wraps itself around my heart and makes it hard to breathe. I can feel the tears form in my eyes but I don't let them out. It turns into anger instead.

"How did you get this Matthew?" I say with a hard voice and a glare.

"I don't know. There was nothing - nothing - on my desk in the lab an hour ago. But when I come back, I find this!" As he points towards the file, I can see that his hands are shaking.

He takes a deep breath as the corners of his mouth begin to twitch runs a hand in through his hair and takes out another slip of paper.

"And this."

I see a photo of Matthew, holding hands with a girl with long black hair, staring into her dark brown eyes. They are smiling at eachother, but the bright red ink destroys the happy picture with a dark message.

_They're coming. Don't let him end up like her._

"Katherine." Matthew says.

"They killed her." His fists clench. "The bureau killed her because she was deterrent. Just like you."

The tears he's been trying to keep in finally spills forward as he begins to explain more.

"They used memory serum on me, so I couldn't remember anything about her Deterrence..."

He takes a deep breath.

"Or how she really died."

He nods.

"I worked on finding out what really happened for months. I looked over her genetic file I hid onto my computer, over and over again and found something. I knew that it was why they wanted to kill her. It was unique and was only in her genetics. As far as I knew, it was what no one else had." He pauses. "Until you came along."

His eyes meet with mine.

"You two had the same mutation in your genes. I always knew was something off about your Divergence and that I had to get to you before somebody like David did. When I saw that mutation in your genes, I knew that you were in danger so I made sure the Bureau wouldn't want to investigate you any further by classifying you as genetically damaged. I replaced your information with information from another GD and gave it a few tweaks to suggest you simply had the ability to be aware during simulations. I never looked at it again after that."

As I look over at Matthew, I can tell that he isn't lying. His tired, aggravated eyes, along with the genuine fear and concern in his voice tells me that this is real. This isn't some cruel prank that Zeke is pulling on me; he is telling me the truth.

"For the past three years, I decided to work on finding a way to get my memories back. I needed to know what happened. I found a way to formulate a serum, based off of the inoculation serum, to reverse the memory loss. It wasn't strong enough, so I was only able to remember a bit of information I had learnt about Deterrents. That's when I found the file and note. I came straight here to warn you."

"So what do you remember about Deterrents?"

"Deterrents, as I've already said, do not fit in any faction, and the reason for that is in their genes, they have something that prevents them from being selfless or brave or kind, etc. They still blend in very well in the faction system since, instead, they learn to adapt to the rules and guidelines, and for some, they become second-nature which at times, can outweigh the Deterrent gene, letting them be brave, selfless, smart. Other times, the Deterrent gene will outweigh the virtues they have learned over time, and they will be selfish, cowardly, dishonest... "

It all makes sense.

No matter how hard I try to deny that it doesn't, I know that it does.

The gears in my head turn and I slowly connect all of the evidence.

Because of Marcus, I never actually did the aptitude test. I had once briefly questioned if I would have done things differently without his instruction, but never thought it would ever be important. I still remember the deep gut-wrenching feeling of uncertainty I felt when I was deciding on the faction that would be my safe haven.

In the end, I chose dauntless. Not because I was brave. It was because I wanted to choose the faction that would hurt my father the most. The faction that would embarrass him so much it would be painful. I wanted him to hurt to the point that he could feel at least a fraction of what I felt.

I chose dauntless, because I was not brave enough to inflict any of that pain I wanted him to feel while looking him in the eyes, like he did to me everyday. I chose dauntless because it would be easier. Because I was a coward.

I could never belong in amity.

I could never belong in candor.

I could never belong in erudite.

I know I didn't belong in abnegation or dauntless.

And I know I am not divergent.

But the thought never occurred to me that I didn't belong anywhere at all. It never occurred to me that it was even possible.

"Why would they want to kill me just because of that?"

Matthew ponders over the thought briefly. It seems that explaining things helps him a lot.

"I don't know. But you saw what was in that file. Somebody warned me that somebody, somehow, found out that you're Deterrent."

"But it's possible that the person responsible for making it could have got their memories erased a long time ago along with everyone else at the Bureau," I realize.

"Why would someone try to warn me if the person's memory was erased?"

We stand there quietly. I don't want to think about this anymore. I look over at the clock that indicates it is now 2:48AM.

"Matthew, it's getting late. Thank you for telling me all of this but we can discuss it more in the morning. We don't even know for sure if there is someone out there coming for me."

"But if there is someone out there..."

"I can protect myself. I was from Dauntless remember? Tomorrow morning, we'll tell the others too."

After a few more minutes of persuasion, Matthew finally heads to the door.

"Just in case."

He hands me a small handgun and I hesitate slightly. I have stayed as far away from violence as I could for the past three and a half years. Despite the bad memories I receive from looking at the silver metal shine from the gun, I take it in my hands.

"Thank you," I say.

Matthew closes the door behind him and as I layed back down in my bed, I am dreading tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or plot lines from the Divergent Trilogy. They all belong to the fantastic writer Veronica Roth.**

**Author's Note: Hello everyone! Here's the new chapter! It took forever to write but I don't know if it's up to the same quality as some of the other chapters because it wasn't planned out as carefully. No spoilers, but the next chapter is going to start adding in much more conflict to the story so stay tuned! I hope you'll enjoy it though and don't forget to leave a review! They help a lot :)**

**Author's Note Update : Just needed to say that I actually won't be posting a chapter this week. I want to spend some time proofreading my current chapters and planning the events for the future chapters. Thank you to everyone for the support and I will come back as soon as possible with an extra long chapter so don't worry! :)**

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><p><strong><span>Chapter 3<span>**

I GET ONLY a few hours of sleep before I wake abruptly from a nightmare. Beads of sweat drip down my forehead and the back of my neck. I shoot straight out of bed.

It was so vivid. It felt so _real_.

In the dream, I was at the banquet again, sitting at the table with all of my friends. We were all laughing and having a good time, just as usual, when the sounds of gunshots came in.

The banquet turned into something out of a horror story. Bright red blood stained the white table cloths and bodies piled on top of eachother. I watched as each of my friends got shot in the chest by faceless men, screaming out for me to help.

The worst part was, I couldn't do anything. I was completely paralyzed. When I had attempt to turn away from the gore, my eyes were met by Uriah's lifless body that placed itself in front of me. He stood up, frowning.

"This was your fault."

I cringe at the memory of the terrifying images and run to the kitchen to where I had left the file. It occurred to me that it was I was stupid to just leave it out in the open like that but I was too sleepy to realize how dangerous it was. A quick relief runs through me when I see it's still there, on the counter. Once I gather all of it together, I take it into my bedroom and lay it out on my bed.

I need to find evidence that what I think is true: whoever made this file can't remember anything now.

When I read over the first document, the signs are good. It dates back to before the memory serum was released. My breathing is still shaky because next, I take the stack of pictures.

It is still on the photo of me and Tris at the Bureau. It brings such a nostalgic feeling to me that I couldn't flip to the next one and take a minute to just look it over. I take in her smile, her peircing eyes, her beautiful hair. Eventually, I decide I can't let go of it just yet, and so I separate it from the rest of the pile and place it next to the blue sculpture on my nightstand.

I flip through more photos. All of them seem out of order but it all points to what I had assumed. Almost all of them are taken before the Bureau's memory was erased.

But when I look at the next photo, I nearly drop the entire pile.

I see myself through the window of my Abnegation home. It didn't seem to be any different from the other photos of me in Abnegation at first, but on closer observation, I see that my face looks much older than it did in the previous ones. What finally gives it away, is the glass vial in my hand

I finally realize that it was taken on the day I was planning to take the memory serum.

I know it was definitely taken _after_ the Bureau's memory was erased..

The beating in my heart begins to speed up as I flip through more and more. I see a photo of me and Evelyn when she came back to the city. I see another one from that one time I was at Millenium Park with Zeke, when he fell off one of the sculptures, breaking his right leg. There's photo after photo of me from the past three years, and when I am finally near the end of the pile - when I thought they couldn't get any worse - I get to one that almost destroys me.

I see myself, sitting in my very own living room. There are numerous photos like this, each with the same angle every time, and a distinct black circular outline around the edges that suggests it is looking through a hole. When I get to the last photo, I notice that it is different from the other ones. When I compare them quickly, I realize what it is. In this last photo, I see the new couch I bought. The couch that I bought _yesterday_

The photo was taken _yesterday_.

I immediately run to the living room and compare the angle of the photo to where I stand until I finally find somewhat of a match. From here, I can clearly see the couch and a decent view of the kitchen. When I turn around, I immediatley see I'm in front of a small drawer and begin to frantically rip it apart.

I open it up and take everything out, inspecting every corner, crack, and split. When I find the hole that looks as though it was made with a pushpin in the drawer panel that lined up perfectly with an identical hole in the back, I start to panic. I push the drawer out of the way completely to reveal a small hole in the wall, and I don't hesitate as I run over to the toolbox I keep in my spare closet and take out a hammer. I swing it against the wall three times with just enough force to create a hole big enough for me to reach my hand inside. I find something. It's a small, black camera the size of the nail on my pinky attached to a small microphone

I take the hammer, crush the devices and run my hands down my face. The images I saw in my dream fill my head and I make a decision. I quickly take an old backpack out of my closet and fill it up with a bunch of clothes, food, and my wallet. I take the gun Matthew gave me and gently tuck it in the pocket of the jeans I slip on. I go over to my bed and grab the file, quickly putting it back together. The picture of me and Tris lays separate from the pile, and so I take it and put it in the pocket of my black sweatshirt, handling it with care.

I remember the words written on Matthews photo.

_They_.

There's more than one person.

_They_.

It's a group.

If I am really in danger, the best thing to do would be to hide and run away. If I leave, they'll follow me.. If there are people out there coming for me, then I would have to get away from here. I need to get away from the people I care about so they won't get caught in the crossfire.

No one is going to die because of me. Never again. No one in this city is going to die.

I don't care what it is that these people at the Bureau will want to do to me. I don't care how much pain they will inflict on me if they manage to catch me. If they ever catch me, it will be far away from Chicago.

I can't let anyone else die.

I don't look back as I sprint out the door.

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><p>By the time I make it to the fence, I'm breathing hard. I get into one of the black cars lined up at the side and throw my bag into the back seat.<p>

These cars are supposed to be used to go back and forth from the Bureau. Usually, people must ask permission to use them and they carpool with others. But since I'm Johanna's assistant, I received my own set of keys.

I turn on the engine and I begin to back up when something stops me. I hit the brakes with my foot and the steering wheel with my fist and let out a silent curse.

How could I have forgotten?

I need to calm down.

Holding the steering wheel, I breathe deeply.

Today is one year from the day I scattered her ashes. I ordered a bouquet of flowers for Tris from a former Amity woman. I've been thinking about it all week, and in the moment I got lost in my fear and completely forgot about her. I take out the photo from my sweatshirt and stare at her beautiful grey eyes. Today is the one day I let myself completely grieve. All the other days, I fill my schedule with work to distract myself. Today is the one day I can mourn, and so, I finally begin to cry, gently running my fingers over the photo.

The decision is too hard. I still love her so much and to think that I won't be there, on the top of the Hancock building, today, makes me sick to my stomach.

Clearly I'm in danger, and if I stay, I'm putting everyone at risk. Johanna told me I had to take care of the city while she's gone. This is how I need to do it. If the Bureau wants me, they'll follow me away from Chicago.

I calm myself down and wipe away my tears.

If she was in this situation, she would leave. She was always so selfless. So perfect. I need to do what she would do.

I can see the sun begin to rise and place the photo back into my pocket.

But before I can even apply pressure back onto the gas, I see two familiar figures run in front of the car.

"Tobias!" Christina and George yell out.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Christina says as she flings open the car door. She continues. "Matthew woke everyone up at five in the morning telling us your apartment was trashed. We go around the entire city looking for you!" Her eyes dart to my bag. "Were you seriously just gonna leave Chicago? Without telling anybody?!"

"Yes."

"Tobias, you better get out of the car right now."

I refuse to move.

"I'm going to put everyone in danger if I stay here, so you two better to get out of the way."

"We aren't leaving. Now get out of the damn car, Tobias!"

I reluctantly give in. I take my bag and slowly step out of the car. Christina and George lead me back to Matthew's office as Christina continues to express her anger and George communicates with the others through his two-way radio. I just listen and walk in silence.

Part of me is glad that I can stay for a little longer. I'm glad that they care for me as much as I care for them. But that's why I need to get away from here. The moment they put their guards down, I'm going to leave. I have to.

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><p>When we get to Matthew's laboratory, I see Shauna and Cara standing behind a counter next to Caleb. Matthew stand in front of them, and they all have a relieved look on their face as I walk into the room.<p>

"Okay, somebody better start explaining what the heck went on last night," Christina demands.

We all gather around the counter and I take the file from my bag and plop it in front of them.

"Let's start from the beginning."

* * *

><p>After half an hour of explaining, the group slightly nods their heads.<p>

"So they've been watching you all this time?" Shauna asks.

"Yes. Which means that they probably know that I found out I'm Deterrent. That's why I need to leave. Whoever it is that is watching me will follow me," I say, in the hopes of persuading them to let me go.

"If you leave, you're only giving them exactly what they want." Matthew says. "It will be that much easier for them to catch you if you're alone. It's best if you just stay here and -"

"And do what? Put everyone else in danger? I can't let that happen."

I can't get the images from my dream out of my head. I need to leave. I need to protect them.

"Don't be so naive." Cara snaps. "If there are people at the Bureau who remember then we're all in danger anyways. Like it or not Tobias but leaving the city all on your own is not an option nor will it help anybody."

Before I can say anything, Caleb interjects.

"She's right. And Tobias, obviously there is something special about Deterrence and if you give them what they want, who knows what they would do with it."

George puts his hand on my back.

"We're your friends, Tobias," he says.

I shrug it off and shake my head.

"That's why I need to stay away from everyone." I beg. "I can't let anybody hurt any of you."

"Well we can't let anybody hurt you either, Tobias," Shauna says.

I try to think of something to say, but I know they're right.

I hate how I can't do anything. I feel powerless. There has to be something I can do.

"We should just wait for Johanna to come back. By then we'll have the U.S. government on our side and the Bureau won't be able to lay a single one of their dirty little fingers on us," Shauna says.

She has a point. But it will take two more days until they come back. By then it could be too late.

"So what do we do? Just wait?" I ask. We can't just wait for them to strike first. It would be too risky. If we've been given this warning then we should use it to our advantage.

"That's all we can do," Matthew says. My heart sinks because I know he's right but it will kill me to just do nothing. But then, he hesitates slightly before continuing. "Unless..."

"Unless what?" I ask. I feel a surge of hope go through me.

"Unless I make some more of the serum to further reverse my memory. I know I saw something that day. They erased my memory for a reason and the quantity I made last time wasn't enough and so I only remember my knowledge but not any actual events that occurred. Maybe it can help us."

"How long would it take to make it?" Christina asks.

"Probably a day or so. It won't take too long since I've written down the procedure but it will still be difficult."

"I can help," Cara says.

"Me too," says Caleb.

"Great. That will help a lot. We'll call you on this the moment we're done." He hands me a two way radio and we take a minute to test it out.

"Well, let's get started."

* * *

><p>I stand on the top of the Hancock building with a bundle of flowers in my right hand. I can see that some people have already come to pay their respects. There are over a dozen bundles of flowers on the edge of the building in front of the cable; all of them are different vibrant colours.<p>

After we discussed everything at the lab, Christina, George, Shauna, and I decided to finally come here. We had stopped by various florists on the way to pick up the flowers we ordered.

We stand around the edge in a semi-circle.

I look towards the flowers in my hand. They're white orchids. I chose them because they were plain and simple, yet still so beautiful - just like how she was.

I watch as everyone else begin placing their flowers on the pile until finally it's my turn. I walk towards the edge of the building and my heart begins to race. I'm still very afraid of heights but I ignore the fear as I slowly place the bouquet of orchids at the top of the pile and take out the picture in my pocket. I contemplate leaving it here for a second but decide to tuck it back in. I can't let it go just yet.

I miss her too much. I miss looking into her beautiful, piercing grey eyes and her soft hair. I curse every second I wasted arguing with her instead of just holding her when I had the chance.

Last night made me miss her more. It was easier to mourn when my life seemed to be going in the right direction, but now that it's taken a turn, I need to hold onto her. The thought of her helps me cope.

"I miss her," Christina says.

"We all do."

George, and Shauna go down the zipline while Christina and I decide to go down using the elevator.

After a breif moment of silence, Christina decides to talk.

"You know, I understand that you felt like you needed to protect us, but what you did was stupid."

"Don't act like you would've handled the situation any better," I snap back.

"Look. It's just that next time, you can't just decide something all on your own. Our friends - we are a team. We've already lost too many people for anyone else to decide they want to be the hero."

"I wasn't trying to be the hero."

"Well whatever you were doing was gonna put you in danger."

"Christina, just leave it. Fine, okay? I won't ever try to pack up and leave the city again." I know it was stupid. I know that now. It's just that in the moment, with the dream still fresh in my mind, I felt like I had to do it. I had to leave.

"I don't care what you have to say," Christina says in a calm voice staring past my face. I should feel angered but the look on her says that she's reminiscing about something. Most likely a bad memory. "You know why? Because people _never_ keep their promises. Just remember that I'm not going to let another one of my friends die either, Tobias."

I was going to say something but we both freeze when we hear footsteps coming from the outside of the elevator. We give each other a look and my hands wrap around my gun immediately. It's been years since I've used a gun and I really dread having to use it.

Luckily, I don't have to.

When the elevator doors finally open, we are instead greeted by someone we know.

"Hello."

I relax and let go of it once I see Susan and her brother Robert, holding a bundle of yellow roses.

Both of them were crushed when they heard that Tris had passed away - after all, they grew up with her. We haven't talked much over the last three years. We would acknowledge each other here and there, but would never strike up a conversation with each other.

I try to smile at them as best as I can as we step out of the elevator.

"How are the both of you doing?"

"We've been good," Christina answers. I'm really glad that she's here because I'm really not in the mood to initiate in any mundane Abnegation talk.

They talk for a few minutes and we catch up on eachother.

Susan had been working at the same place Christina was; relocating people from the Fringe into Chicago. The job has been less stressful since fewer people have been coming in.

Robert remained working in the fields in what was once called Amity. He said he still enjoyed it very much, and that someone had to keep growing food.

I still remember how I felt when I had met Robert for the first time. It took me a while to remember that he was the person who hugged Tris that day at the gates, and after that, I can't say I acted very fondly towards him. However, my coldness eventually wore off for the same reason it wore off for Caleb.

After we went our separate ways, the conversation Christina and I was having in the elevator was not discussed again but her words continue to linger in my mind.


End file.
